Let's Make a Deal

"Rex, I think you're perfectly well aware of why I asked to see you today." Mavis Schuyler looked at her niece's boyfriend, disdain on her patrician, surgically enhanced features.

Rex winked at Mavis. "I never took you for the cougar type but, yeah, I can see it now that we're alone together for once."

Mavis cringed. "What are you talking about?"

"You aren't too bad looking for an older broad. I know you chicks over forty dig us young guys but you should know that I'm totally smitten with your niece--although that doesn't mean I wouldn't consider the idea. I'm open to all kinds of experiences."

Mavis narrowed her eyes until they were twin slits of Midnight Blue Eyeliner. "Please do not further revolt me, Rex, by continuing to speak. I am not a 'cougar' but if I ever did decide to venture down that particular path, I assure you that you're the least likely candidate for my affections in the entire universe after Sasquatch but it would be a very close race."

Rex frowned. "Whatever. I'm just saying that you know where to find me and Tiffany would be none the wiser. I can be real discreet."

"Don't hold your breath," Mavis suggested. "Now what I want to talk about is your upcoming marriage to Tiffany. You should know that while Tiffany is going to inherit some money on her eighteenth birthday, she won't come into the bulk of it until she's thirty."

"What? Tiffany never told me that!"

"Probably because Tiffany never listens whenever I attempt to discuss finances with her. You should also know that I have complete control of Tiffany's finances until her thirtieth birthday."

"So what are we supposed to do while waiting for the rest of her bucks?"

"Might I suggest finding a job?"

"If I wanted to work, I'd marry someone poor like me."

"I take it you don't want to work?"

"Who does? That pretty much sucks, Mavis. Can't you fix things so Tif can get her hands on her money right now? Her mom left it to her, didn't she?"

"Yes, Tiffany's mother left her money to Tiffany, not to any gold-digging creep who might come along."

"Are you saying that you think I'm a gold-digging creep?" Rex demanded.

"You took the words right out of my mouth," Mavis said sweetly. She held up her hand. "Shhh. I heard the front door. That will be Tiffany. Not a word about this conversation, Rex."

"What conversation? You did all the talking and I did all the listening."

"And you did it surprisingly well. Now if you continue to listen to me, I'll make it worth your trouble."

"Aunt Mavis? Where are you?" Tiffany's voice floated down the hallway.

"I'll give you five thousand dollars to disappear from Tiffany's life for good."

Rex considered the offer for less than two seconds before holding out his hand. "Make it ten and we've got a deal, Aunt Mavis."

Schuyler Square Day 130 Mindy and Tyler

"What would you think about getting engaged?"

Tyler Schuyler spit out the ice cream he was eating. "What?"

Minday looked at her boyfriend of almost two months coolly. "Don't act like I just asked what you thought about getting West Nile disease. I'm talking about getting married."

"To who?"

"To me, silly." Tyler might be cute but he sure was on the dumb side. That was OK with Mindy. She liked being the smart one in a couple. It made for a lot less headaches. Tyler could be Pinky and she'd be The Brain. "Why not? We get along, we have fun together, we're both quite attractive--I bet any kids we produced would be stunning."

"You're asking me to marry you? I thought guys were supposed to ask girls."

"Tyler, that thinking is positively antiquated. Why should I wait for you to ask me?" Mindy didn't add that she knew that if she did wait, she'd be old and grey before Tyler got around to popping the question. She didn't want to be old and grey before she got married; she wanted to be young enough to enjoy shopping and taking fabulous vacations. "So, what do you think?"

Tyler slowly finished the enormous sundae that he'd ordered. "Well," he finally said, "I don't think it's a totally bad idea."

"Gee, thanks."

"Don't get mad. It's just that we don't know each other all that well. Marriage is a big step."

Tyler obviously had never heard of divorces. "I know it's a big step," Mindy said patiently. "That's why people get engaged first, to see if they're ready to get married. We could get engaged, have a sumptuous engagement party at your house, maybe even move in together and see what happenes next."

She watched as Tyler processed the idea. It was like watching a cow chew its cud. "I guess we could do that," Tyler said after several long minutes of deliberation. "Would I have to get you a ring or something?"

"A ring would be nice." Mindy would pick it out, however. She didn't trust Tyler to choose anything big enough.

"Would we have to tell anyone that we're engaged?"

"Why? Are you ashamed of me?"

"No, but you know how my mother is."

Oh, yes. Mindy knew exactly how Mavis Schuyler was, which was another reason why she wanted to be engaged to Tyler even if it was only for a week or two. It would make Mavis nuts and that was reason enough for Mindy. "Your mother and I will become the best of friends," she predicted, smiling sweetly at her almost-fiance. "I bet we'll find that we have a lot in common. Come on, Tyler, what do you say? Will you marry me?"

"I guess so," Tyler answered.

Mindy picked up her spoon and began eating her own sundae. Tyler's response wasn't what she'd call enthusiastic but that was all right. He'd said yes.

Schuyler Square Day 113 Investigative Journalism

“Mindy, I think you need to pursue this with everything you’ve got,” Tyler Schuyler told his new girlfriend. “Peter Van Husen obviously knows something about Mary Austin’s murder and it’s up to you, as the press in Schuyler Square, to nail him on it.”

“I agree completely,” Mindy said. “You have no idea of what a relief it is to be with someone who supports my career instead of tells me to mind my own business.”

“You’re a journalist,” Tyler replied. “It’s your duty to investigate a story like this one.” Tyler felt slightly guilty over the way he was pumping Mindy up just so she’d go after Peter Van Husen but he felt like he was at the end of his rope. His mother’s boyfriend simply would not leave the family home and Tyler was starting to feel like he’d have to be the one to move out just to get away from the highly distasteful living circumstances at Schuyler Manor. But now he had a glimmer of hope.

Mindy kissed him. “Tyler, you’re wonderful. My last boyfriend didn’t understand what my job involves but you seem to get it.”

Tyler smiled modestly. “What’s there to get? We all have jobs to do. I know that once I graduate from college and start to work for Schuyler Industries I’m going to have to do whatever it takes to keep the family business going.”

“Um, what are you going to do there?” Mindy asked. “I’ve been wondering about that since you’re majoring in art history. How are you going to tie that in with the family business?”

“I haven’t decided yet,” Tyler said thoughtfully. “I might make it my mission to travel around the world and purchase new art pieces for the plant. When you’re the owner, you really get to make up your own job description.”

“That sounds lovely,” Mindy said wistfully. “All right, first things first: I’m going to go and down to those people who just bought Mary Austin’s house. Maybe they’ll let me go through it and see if I can find anything that would tie Peter Van Husen to the scene of the crime.”

“Let’s go ask Rosanne right now,” Peter urged. “I’m sure she won’t mind.”

Mindy hesitated. “Do you think your mom will get upset with me? After all, it’s her boyfriend that I’m trying to nail.”

Tyler shook his head. “Mother only cares about justice and doing the right thing,” he lied. “She’s going to be very supportive of your investigation, I guarantee it.”

“If you say so,” Mindy replied. “It still feels kind of strange to me. Perhaps I should talk to Peter first.”

“No! Find out everything you can and then talk to Peter. He’s been acting oddly lately anyway. I’m sure that whatever you find out is going to be a relief to him.”

“All right,” Mindy agreed. “You know him better than I do.”

Mindy was right about that one. Tyler felt like he knew Peter Van Husen far too well. The time had come—it was past the time—for his mother’s boyfriend to move on and if that meant helping Mindy implicate Peter in an old murder, well, so be it. “Let’s go talk to Rosanne,” Tyler said.

 

Schuyler Square Day 97 Dee Dee Pays a Visit to Mavis

"I think I'd like you to leave. Right now." Mavis Schuyler glared at her guest with the laser look that she usually reserved for slow clerks at Bloomingdale's and inept parking valets. The nerve of this woman coming to her home and announcing that someone living at Schuyler Manor was linked to some nobody's death twenty years earlier!

Dee Dee Cooper was perched nervously on the edge of a couch in the living room. Although she looked as if there was nothing she'd like to do more than jump up and run from the room, she didn't move a muscle. "I realize that I might be a touch presumptuous dropping in on you like this," she began. Mavis cut her off immediately.

"I think you're a little more than a 'touch' presumptuous. A wallop would be more like it. How dare you come over here and make false accusations!"

"I'm only trying to get to the bottom of this mystery," Dee Dee replied. "You have no idea what it's like living in that house. That poor woman's spirit is still there and she's so noisy! Always knocking things over and waking my husband and me up in the middle of the night. We haven't had a decent night of sleep since we moved in."

"I hardly see how that's my problem."

"It isn't your problem but wouldn't you like to help us if you can?"

"Not particularly."

"What's going on, babe?" Peter entered the living room dressed in sweat pants, a weight lifting belt and nothing else, his bare chest glistening with sweat. "Is something wrong?"

"Nothing I can't handle," Mavis snapped. "And please don't sit down, Peter. You're all sweaty."

"Sorry. I was just working out when I heard your voice. You sounded upset."

"That's my fault," Dee Dee informed him. "I'm afraid I have upset your--wife."

"We aren't married," Mavis said.

"Yet," Peter put in.

Mavis ignored him. "Now would you kindly get the hell out of my house?"

"What are you two talking about that has you so worked up?" Peter inquired.

"We have a ghost living in our house," Dee Dee explained. "Her name is Mary Austin and she told us during a seance last night that whoever murdered her is living in Schuyler Manor. I came to talk to Mavis about it."

"Do you see what I'm dealing with?" Mavis said, whirling so that she was facing Peter. "This woman is obviously deranged! How could anyone living here have had anything to do with that poor woman's murder? I never knew her and Tyler was just a baby twenty years ago and even if Ron had known her, Ron's dead--"

But as Mavis spoke she noticed that the color was draining out of Peter's face, leaving him almost exactly the same shade of grey as his sweat pants.

Schuyler Square Day 63 Tyler in a Tiff

Tyler didn't get it. Truthfully, there was little in life that Tyler did get. Why couldn't people just be nice to each other? Why couldn't everyone follow the rules, do the right thing and share their Dortios at lunch time? He knew that he was hopelessly Out of It but Tyler, age twenty-two and heir to a mega-fortune, no longer cared. So what if he wasn't Cool? He was a nice human being and that had to count for something.

He stood in the doorway of the living room brooding. It made him positively ill to see his mother sitting with that slimeball police officer. Granted, his parents' marriage hadn't been the stuff dreams was made of but did she have to be so blatant?

"Tyler," his mother said, her voice three martini's past tipsy, "You remember Officer Van Husen."

"Of course I do," Tyler snapped. "What's he doing here?"

His mother hesitated. "Peter needs a place to stay for a while. I'm going to let him stay with us."

Her words remained in the air like time bombs. Finally, Tyler said, "Are you out of your mind?"

"I'm here because your mom needs me," the creepy, uber blond cop told him. "She was kidnapped, Tyler. I'm going to stay with you and your family to keep everyone safe."

Yeah, right. And Cool Whip was diet food. Good grief, what was wrong with his mother that she couldn't see through this...this white bread faux protector? Was she that desperate?

"Tyler? You look upset. Are you all right?"

"I am upset," Tyler said through clenched teeth. "Dad isn't even cold and you're moving in his replacement?"

Mavis paled. "It isn't like that."

"All right," Tyler said evenly, "then where's Officer Van Husen sleeping tonight?"

He watched as Peter Van Husen and his mother exchanged shifty glances. It was embarrassing to be in the same room with the two of them, they looked so complicit. "In the guest room, of course," his mother replied.

"Where else?" Peter murmured.

Where else indeed? Tiffany had all but told him what was going on between Schuyler Square's finest and his own mother but Tyler hadn't believed her. He was unable to believe that the woman who had made him peanut butter and jelly sandwiches whenever the maid was sick, the woman who had tucked him in and read him a bedtime story at least once a month, the woman who had given birth to him was fooling around with a guy young enough to be her nephew. It was sickening.

"All right," Tyler said. "As long as everything is above board of course I don't mind if Officer Van Husen stays here. I think it's an honor to have someone of his caliber as our guest and of course I'm pleased to know that he only has your best interests at heart, Mother."

Mavis looked away guiltily and Officer Van Husen looked a little sick to his stomach. Tyler felt sick too. His dad hadn't been gone for a week and Mom was moving in the replacements. Was there no justice in this world?

Sometimes, Tyler thought grimly, you have to make your own justice.